Yesterday, Holy Thursday, I thought about the Catholic Church and how after the Thursday evening service, they take the \”bread-which-is-Jesus\” out of the church; and then pretend Jesus is not in the church. Then, on Friday, they serve \”leftover-bread-that-is-Jesus.\” Then at the vigil on Saturday night or Sunday pre-dawn, they make new \”bread-which-is-Jesus.\” After that, Jesus stays in the church for the rest of the year.
At this point in my life, that all sounds preposterous. One of the reasons I left organized religion was because I believe that every molecule, photon and the smaller or even non-existent particle (thinking of you SGL), is either holy, spirit filled and the Real Presence; or their is no God and none of this matters.
I believe there is a Higher Power. I don\’t say God because there is too much incorrect teaching about what God could be. But none of this matters as it is an illusion.
So, in the monastery, Good Friday was used for penance and confession. When I was a novice, I was excluded from some of the sisters activities; so I did the unseemly thing. I went running.
As I was running today, I thought about my monastic life. As a matter of fact, I owe my current spiritual capability to my monastic training. See I don\’t get involved in distractions from the knowledge of God\’s presence because of those 4 years cut off from the world. I want to be grateful to the sisters rather than being angry they kicked me out. As a matter of fact, my spirituality is far better now than if I\’d remained in a Roman Catholic Convent. As I ran, saying my day\’s psalm, I did feel happy for the gift of contemplation.
Let me remember what my purpose is.
Let me remember that my goal is God.
Setting aside all little senseless aims.
Achieving only what You want me to.
To celebrate Easter this year, I thought of buying a symbolic piece of body wear. It turns out, I spent $35 on an aqua titanium neck band. It is white and I tied 3 knots in it to symbolize the Trinity. I look very hip in it.
Today was Good Friday indeed. I got up at 5 and hit the park by 6:30. I jog/walked 8x2s for almost 4 hours. Then I came home just as the guys delivering the new treadmill showed up. I bought a new treadmill because of too much concrete in Texas and no hills at all. I got a really good Life Fitness treadmill. It cost less than 2 weeks salary (after taxes and 401K). This afternoon, I walked another 5 miles uphill on the treadmill as well as lift weights and do core. My new shorts also came today.
So different from being a nun. Here are some picture from my last half marathon where I won 2nd place in my age group. The last one is with one of my Canadian friends.